Scenario 1: Jack pulls into school parking lot with rifle in gun rack.
1957 - Vice Principal comes over, takes a look at Jack's rifle, goes to his car and gets his rifle, to show Jack.
2007 - School goes into lockdown, FBI called, Jack hauled off to jail and never sees his truck or gun again. Counselors called in for traumatized students and teachers
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Scenario 2: Johnny and Mark get into a fist fight after school.
1957 - Crowd gathers. Mark wins. Johnny and Mark shake hands and end up best friends. Nobody goes to jail, nobody arrested, nobody expelled.
2007 - Police called, SWAT team arrives, arrests Johnny and Mark. Charge them with assault, both expelled even though Johnny started it.
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Scenario 3: Jerry won't be still in class, disrupts other students.
1957 - Jerry sent to office and given a good paddling by Principal. He sits still in class.
2007 - Jerry given huge doses of Ritalin. Becomes a zombie. School gets extra money from state because Jeffrey has a disability.
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Scenario 4: Billy breaks a window in his father's car and his Dad gives him a whipping.
1957 - Billy is more careful next time, grows up normal, goes to college, and becomes a successful businessman.
2007 - Billy's Dad is arrested for child abuse. Billy removed to foster care and joins a gang. Billy's sister is told by state psychologist that she remembers being abused herself and their Dad goes to prison. Billy's mom has affair with psychologist.
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Scenario 5: Mark gets a headache and takes some headache medicine to school.
1957 - Mark shares headache medicine with Principal out on the smoking dock.
2007 - Police called, Mark expelled from school for drug violations. Car searched for drugs and weapons. Car seized and turned over to sheriff's DARE program.
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Scenario 6: Pedro fails high school English.
1957 - Pedro goes to summer school, passes English, and goes to college.
2007 - Pedro's cause is taken up by ACLU. Newspaper articles appear nationally explaining that teaching English as a requirement for graduation is racist. ACLU files class action lawsuit against state school system and Pedro's English teacher. English banned from core curriculum. Pedro given diploma anyway but ends up mowing law ns for a living because he can't speak English.
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Scenario 7: Johnny takes apart leftover firecrackers from the 4th of July, puts them in a model airplane paint bottle, and blows up a red ant bed.
1957 - Ants die.
2007 - BATF, Homeland Security, FBI called. Johnny charged with domestic terrorism, FBI investigates parents, siblings removed from home, computers confiscated, Johnny's Dad goes on a terror watch list and is never allowed to fly again. PETA sues Johnny for cruelty to the Red Ants.
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Scenario 8: Johnny falls while playing in a kickball game during recess and scrapes his knee. He is found crying by his teacher, Mary. Mary hugs him to comfort him.
1957 - In a short time Johnny feels better and goes on playing.
2007 - Mary is accused of being a sexual predator and loses her job. She faces 3 years in State Prison. Kickball is banned from school after Johnny's parents sue the school. Forty-four other parents join in making it a class action suit.
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3 comments:
Funny story: I usually have a bottle of aspirin in my car that I occassionally take before school if I feel a headache coming on. One day I was sharing cordialities with the Vice Principal- joking about rule-breaking, when I said "Yeah, right- and I guess I'll get in trouble for taking Aspirin out in the parking lot"
She had this stern, concerned look on her face at once, and said "Do you really? You know that's against the rules, don't you?" I expected the police to enter at that moment, but my charm happened to bail me out. The rest of the day I was paranoid about my car being searched.
That's unbelievable. My favorite story about this kind of stuff involved my best friend. We were both in the same junior high art class, and our teacher had lost his hand and had a hook. My friend was goofing off one day in class, and as he told it he was looking down at the floor, and the next moment he was staring at the ceiling. The teacher had uppercut him with his good hand right in the kisser. He told that story for years, and everytime he did he was laughing about it. He didn't run home and tattle and nobody got sued. He didn't goof off, as much, after that incident.
i used to sneak out behind the convent, in a quiet corner, all alone to have smoke. one day i came back to class with the pack still in my shirt pocket (oops). the nun pointed it out to me, told me she's been seeing where i go, and as long as i kept low, she would leave me alone.
and i never had an issue with the buck knife strapped to my boot.( i wore stormtrooper boots/trench coat every day. ok, so i was wierd)
today i would get arrested, and sent to juvie, like my 17 yr old stepson did when they found he had a two-inch folding swiss army knife.
(as you can tell: i was no altar boy)
times have changed...
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