Friday, February 09, 2007

Psycho squirrels are up to their old tricks

Story tip from Palm Boy

BREAKING NEWS: Driver says he hit Long Branch bank to avoid squirrel
A 19-year-old man told police he swerved his car to miss a squirrel while arguing with his girlfriend just before he drove through the lobby of a bank at 339 Broadway early this morning, said Detective Sgt. Fernando Sanders.

They are insidious little creatures aren't they. What they lack in size, they more than make up for in ingenuity. They can't just trample you like an elephant, nor coil around and strangle you like an anaconda; but they can force you to hurt yourself by driving your car into solid objects. Let this be a lesson; if you're driving and a squirrel runs out into the road, just keep going straight. At that point it is survival of the fittest, and if the squirrel doesn't want to become road-kill stew for some crow, he'll get the heck out of the way.

3 comments:

RobertDWood said...

Ya know, I thought they just ran across the road for cheap thrills, but this may have been the plan all along.

Them, and ducks. I swear, ducks are the strangest creatures to drive around. They stand in your way, and practically beg you to run them over. So, you try and frighten them by honking, and so the entire flock takes that as a 'hello' and they start honking back.

At least squirrels don't talk to the car.

imfreenow.blogspot.com said...

amazing how you find these stories!

Anonymous said...

Probably one of my strangest driving experiences: I had turned onto a little side street in a suburb one time, and found myself in the middle of a landing zone for a flock of geese. I stopped while about 30 of them came in for landings all around my car. I finally zig-zagged my way around and got out of there. That was weird.

kingdavid