Out There section of Fox News
Lots of Almonds, but Little Joy for Two California Thieves
FRESNO, Calif. (AP) — Authorities announced Monday that they recovered 44,000-pounds of stolen almonds after the suspected thieves tried to sell the processed nuts on the black market.
Picture the scene in your mind. They're holed up in a building; bleeding from all the bullet wounds; the entire Bolivian army camped outside; guns trained on the door.
Butch: I've got an idea Sundance.
Sundance: Yeah, what is it this time Butch
Butch: Almonds
Sundance: Almonds!!!
Butch: Yes, it's a sure thing. We go up into California, hijack about 50,000 pounds of almonds, then we sell them back to someone on the black market.
Sundance: Ha Ha Ha. You keep thinking Butch, that's what you're good at.
Honestly, what is it within the minds of thieves that allow them to come up with these kinds of plots, and what kind of IQ is required to think you could actually get away with it. Did they come up with a nifty little name for their enterprise: The Almond Bandits, The Nutcase Gang.
Let's put this to the test. You're a basic thieving twit, maybe looking to score some cash for drugs, or to feed your candy bar habit. You don't want to take any chances robbing a bank. What would be something out of the ordinary that you could steal which would get you ready cash?
(Imagine theme from Jeopardy playing)
Times up. What did you come up with? How about manure? How much would 50 tons of cow manure bring on the black market. I'm gonna plot an escapade to hijack a manure truck; anybody with me.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment