Sunday, September 30, 2007

As an American; I'm disappointed we didn't bring home the gold

As a carnivore who thinks their are only three basic sources of meat--from those that moo, oink and sometimes cluck---I find this hard to digest.

Swede crowned world oyster-opening champion
GALWAY (Reuters) - A Swede won the world oyster-opening championship on Saturday after he shucked a shellfish every five seconds with a minimum of blood and grit.

Let's see em do it where the winner has to show a maximum of blood and grit. I'd watch that.

Damage to the oyster's flesh, failure to detach it from the shell, grit or traces of human blood mean penalties for the knife-wielding competitors who have come from 16 other countries including Thailand, the United States and Estonia.

It didn't say, but I hope at least that we beat the Estonians, how embarrasing would that be.

"Oysters are the taste of the ocean and they are very pure and natural," said Canadian chef and author Patrick McMurray, a past world oyster opening champion. "It has an elemental property which just gives pure happiness to everyone."

I don't mean to rain on this guy's parade; but he should know that there's at least one person, out of the 6 billion or so on this planet, that wouldn't eat an oyster if the bluebird of happiness himself came and tried to plop one in my mouth.


I know that food snobs everywhere seem to think that presentation is huge part of the dining experience; but you know what, laying them in their own little indented niche on a plate and tossing in some little colored wormy looking things in the center, isn't going to take away the fact that they still look like slimy, gelatinous chunks of blubber. Yuck.

7 comments:

Gabrielle Eden said...

Amen, brother!

Gino said...

i just call them loogies in the half shell.

Guitarman said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Guitarman said...

I've eaten Oyster (not pluralized intentially) one (1) time in my life. And I think it was on a dare and alcohol was involved. I Find clams a superior choice....but only if no other food is available....on earth.

Palm boy said...

I think those are bell peppers and onions.

And blubber in a shell, good description.

Dan S. said...

The Americans didn't win? Aw, shucks!

(sorry)

Bike Bubba said...

I always figured your taste would run more to the "Rocky Mountain" type, KD. :^)

I've tried "loogies on the half shell" (saltwater type), and ....well...let's just say that there are other things I like better.