Gabrielle asked earlier if I was on this story: LIKE WHITE ON RICE

Due to my high journalistic standards though, I wanted to gather some more facts. Here's the story as presented by The Star Tribune.

Mystery animal claws Itasca State Park camper
Authorities said the animal attack Thursday at Itasca State Park is an "oddity."
In the dark of night, a creature swiped at Jon Kenning's face as he slept in a tent in Itasca State Park on Thursday morning and then the animal disappeared.

The park at the headwaters of the Mississippi River is home to everything from squirrels and chipmunks to beaver, wolves and black bears.

What they mean to say is that no terrorist organization has yet to claim responsibility for this wanton act of violence against a human. When is the mainstream media going to start calling a spade, a spade, and quit pretending that these terrorists are actually rodents of peace. As is the case with Islamic terrorists, there are many disparate groups involved in this animal jihad that is taking place. So far, the main group of rodent terrorists have belonged to Al Rodenta, and follow the leadings of Rocky bin Rodent. There's a new group on the block though, and I believe they are responsible for this latest act. This group calls themselves 'Skwerreltroopers.' Don't let the fact they can't spell fool you, they're vicious and fanatic. Not much is known about the leader of this group, but I uncovered one of the few pictures there is of him. His name is Darth Rodent.


The public hasn't been told much regarding these organizations by the government, and the liberal media simply refuses to publish stories which highlight the acts of these "peaceful" followers of rodenthood.
Through the Freedom of Information Act, I was able to obtain some documents that expose these terrorists for what they are; but, as you can see, most of the information is blacked out.

Sure, some stories pop up now and then; but, to get full picture of the threat against humanity, we have to turn to the blogosphere to get the truth. Here are a few more sites that might interest you, if you really want to protect yourselves and loved ones.

The Bushy Tailed Rat

North American Defense Against Squirrels

There are many brave people out there putting their lives on the line to bring you the truth about these organizations. The person who made the following video barely got away with his jewels intact; however, he is currently in hiding, as a fatwa was decreed demanding his immediate death.

This video shows one of the most common tactics employed by these terrorists. Watch and learn.

Next time this happens to you, run 'em over.